Friday, January 14, 2011

Dr.Phil,Ted Williams,Alcohol And Drugs,Not Necessary In That Order

Man it's been some kind of week for Ted Williams the brother with the "golden voice" found panhandling in Columbus,Ohio a few short weeks ago.
Like many around the country and world I was hoping and wishing the best for this brother,and I'm still hoping and wishing the best.
But after watching him for three days this week on The Dr.Phil Show(Which I don't normally watch) I have conclude that before this brother go back out into the working world,he must get some type of help for the issues that plague his life.
Yes all of us have issues that plague our lives but not many of us get a chance like Ted Williams has to get help.
Alcohol and drugs has affected Ted Williams to the point that this brother don't know which way is up.
Turns out  he hasn't been clean and free from alcohol and drugs as it was first reported by him,despite his deception Dr.Phil and others,including me and others I know  still support the ideal of giving him a second,third and fourth chance.
Alcohol and drugs are a monster in my community,that monster has affected me personally and I know you just don't stop and quit without a lot of help,spiritually,mentally and medically.
When I first saw this story  and viewed the video over at another  blogsite(My Brown Eye View),I instinctively  knew the whole truth wasn't being told.
I try not to be judge,jury and hangman in my assessment of people today and it's hard  sometimes,because when it walks like a duck,talks like a duck,nine times out of ten it's a duck.
Like so many families(mine included) alcohol and drugs has created such dysfunctionality that only God can navigate any kind of solution.
Not even Dr.Phil with all his education and resources can  get Ted Williams  and his family better.
Ted Williams and his family has to REALLY WANT to get the life that God intended for each and everyone of us.
Dr.Phil can only take them to the water,he can't make them drink it!


CareyCarey said...

Big Mac, you took the words right out of my mouth.

At another site (Shadow & Act) they posted his first video (hustling at curb)and my first response was... this guy has a real big problem. I wasn't throwing my hands in the air and saying thank ya jesus.

Just like you, I didn't want to judge the guy, but having gone down his road, when I looked in his eyes as he said he had 2 years clean, I knew something wasn't right.

So, I'll share what I posted over there...

I said: I’ve been around thousands of alcoholics and drug addicts (it’s my day job) so I knew something wasn’t quite right. As I said in the other post, Mr Williams is in a fight for his life that only a few ever survive. And, riches and fame will not be his saving grace.

I knew the chips would quickly come falling down. Now lets see if Mr Williams can truly recover. The odds are against him. Addiction takes no prisoners.

January 13th, 2011 at 11:32 am · Reply
And, to add a little more insight to Mr Williams problem, I submit the following.

Given the charisma, charm, and pleasing voice of Mr William, and his years of addiction, I can safely assume he has been a patient in several treatment centers. The national average for those with similar problems is about 4-5 rehabs before recovery is remotely possible. The cost of rehab can run from $20,000 to $50,000… or more!

So, I am suggesting that this is not Mr William’s first rodeo, so change (for him) will be very hard to come by. And, that’s the life of those suffering from substance abuse.

I spoke of this subject (many times) at my blog. Check out some of the responses.

Reggie: “My parents smoked like industry. My brother and my sister both smoke. My father had cancer so severe that it almost killed him. The doctors cut as much of it out of him as they could and still leave him alive. My mother had lung cancer surgery. She lost a third of her lung; and yet if you went to her home today, it would smell like cigarette smoke because she refuses to quit.I have never smoked…..won’t ever smoke. I hate the habit. It’s digusting to me and the thought of cigarettes turns my stomach”

MIZ: “All my life my entire family father, uncles, aunts, etc…drank, it was common, it was accepted…i don’t really know what will bring about a change…cuz i see myself in them as well. Not addicted, but certainly not trying to give it up either. Addiction is not something anyone can help with if the individual addicted doesn’t seek or want help. I have had at least 2 members of my family fight addiction with both drugs and alcohol (ie Heroin and Cocaine) and neither of them really won the battle. One died from liver disease, but he did stop, just too late, another is still fighting, but not willingly.”

2cute4you said: “Quite a scary topic you picked on to discuss. I never knew alcohol was a more dangerous addiction and coming from home where everyone drinks and sometimes the violence that came with it(the violence is in the past), it made me hate alcohol to the amazement of everyone around me..
I hate alcohol, I can’t stand the smell, I can’t cope with anyone that takes more than a glass or two, it gets me all riled up..”

MsKnowItAll said: “This post hits home for me because a number of my family members battle addiction. And there’s nothing I can do, say, scream, yell or cry about it to change it. Like you, I can’t be around them when they’re drinking because they are not themselves. They find the words to say things they wouldn’t say while sober. There is anger or aggressiveness that isn’t present any other time. It hurts to isolate them especially knowing that they are probably already feeling low…”

And the beat goes on.

Anonymous said...

Big Mac,
I totally agree with what your saying. It's not about being judgemental, but understanding that, he's not there or ready, at this point to embrace, the help and love being offered, because of the hold the addiction has on him. Like you, I'm still hoping and wishing the best for him and his family, but As Carey said, the odds are against him, addiction takes no prisoners. The question now is, can HE and his family find, their way to a recovery?

Mizrepresent said...

Like you and the rest of the world, i want Ted Williams to make it. What a wonderful story, a beautiful fantasy, but as we all know, the truth is Ted is an addict, and if any of us has known an alcoholic or an addict, we also know that it can be a lifelong addiction without help, and perseverance. I watched his interview and i saw so much of my brother in him, a good man, yes. A grateful man, yes, but his demons still lingered and it would only be a matter of time (which we all know now to be the truth) that he would return to the bottle and then the drugs. It's not gonna be easy, in fact it will be the most difficult task of his life, but he should feel truly blessed, because there are alot of addicts and alcoholics out there who won't have a home to return to, income, job or fame, thus why so many end up back on the street. Many will not get treatment or only accept it for a short time, only to return to their devices. My brother went nearly 38 years addicted, spent 2 years alcohol free before he passed. I don't blame him for his addiction, i applaud him for the willingness and courage to get clean on his own. I wish the same for Ted Williams.

CareyCarey said...

"The question now is, can HE and his family find, their way to a recovery?"

Lil Bit, I don't know your religious beliefs, but when I saw that sentence, I thought of 2 things.

First, a song by the Winans, "The Question Is". It's a beautiful song that says it all.

Second, "be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers; for what fellowship have righteousness with unrighteousness? And what communion have light with darkness?" 2 corithians 6:14

msladydeborah said...

Big Mac,

I happen to believe that God walks in mysterious ways. And Ted's story might be a true living example of this belief.

The brother has had the door opened to the support that he needs. I just hope and pray that this time around, he makes wiser choices than he did before.

Reggie said...

What I think is hilarious BigMac is how you felt you had to qualify how you don't USUALLY watch Dr. Phil.

Yeah, that brother needed some help in the worst way didn't he?!?

I guess I didn't see this BECAUSE it was on Dr. Phil's show.

Moanerplicity said...

Somehow as this was all playing out before our eyes, I didn't have a good feeling about the outcome, simply b/c of how OVERWHELMING it must be to have all that NATIONAL & WORLDWIDE attention suddenly placed upon you, your family, your story, your talent & your sobriety.

I applaud Dr. Phil for being a maverick in the media storm. Instead of exploiting the man for his own personal gain (ratings/ more coverage), he appears to really WANT to help this man defeat his demons, once & for all. I pray he does indeed rid himself of those demons. That would be the greatest story... not how a once homeless man w/ a gift from God garnered so much attention, but how this man got his life in order, reunited with loved ones, righted some wrongs, and made an example of his existence.

Not only would the outcome inspire others, but this one man's victory would be more than a human interest story. It would be EPIC!


Anonymous said...

But thank God for Dr. Phil, whatever his motivation is. I pray that Ted Williams snatches this opportunity to get clean, with all the free accomodations that he's been offered.
I saw part of one of those episodes, and he seemed fearful, if not a little overwhelmed. But he also comes across as being able to handle difficulties, as he's been very cool calm and collected most of the time.

I hope he can put that to bear on his own situation, outside of the cameras and grab this chance to face whatever it takes to get clean. This may be that last go around that it takes before success happens!! Im praying for him to make it!

Anonymous said...

I hope he makes it too and I hope all the attention has a positive influence on his recovery but like you said Big Mac, it is up to him. I support him and all of us who fight this battle.

BigmacInPittsburgh said...

Carey:Always appreciate your insight on matters.
LilBit:You got to want to get better to get better,no Dr.Phil is going to do what you need to do.
Miz:Thanks for sharing what has to be a very painful and personal part of your life.
They say if we don't share it we can't get better.
Msdeb:Keep bring us news and information we can't see else where.

Reggie:And your point?

BigmacInPittsburgh said...

Lin:I can always expect what you have to say ,will be something to stimulate my thinking to a even higher plane.
Anna:as always your thoughts take it to another level,thank you!
Coach:Thanks for all you do and say,your posts always seem to hit me where they need to hit me.

Dirty Red said...

I could see it also. This dude got a problem and being thrown money with no treatment is only gonna make it worse. Besides you are right; he has to want treatment. You can't help someone that thinks they don't need help.

Black Diaspora said...

Bigmac: "Like so many families(mine included) alcohol and drugs has created such dysfunctionality that only God can navigate any kind of solution."

I truly strive to see God, Perfection, in all things, and this seemingly tragic story is no exception.

One thing I've learned: The "Big Picture" is always bigger than our imaginations, and the whys and wherefores more profound than our guesses.

Of this I'm certain: No one dies in vain (All who know of the death are impacted to some degree.) and no one lives in vain (for all who knew of us, briefly or for a lifetime--to them we were an angel).

To someone, Ted Williams is, and has been, an angel. I can only speculate the ways, for we have no way of reckoning the number of lives he has touched--either as a negative example ("I don't wish to be like him."), or as a positive example ("Although Ted is struggling to overcome his demons, perhaps with a little more effort I can overcome mine.")

We often hear the saying, "But for the grace of God go I...." I say, instead, "There go I."

On many levels Ted Williams and I are one.

Anonymous said...

I agree with Black Diaspora--Ted Williams is any one of us. He's brave, he's open, he might just BE an Angel!!!
He's certainly got an angelic persona. And he did say that he wants to be clean and readily admits his issues, his faults, his mistakes.
What a HUGE gift God has given him and yes I believe he's blessing millions of us!! Whatever our "issue" might be!!

God bless the angel, Ted Williams and I wish him nothing but all good things and love and joy and sobriety!

CareyCarey said...

Black Diaspora: "One thing I've learned: The "Big Picture" is always bigger than our imaginations, and the whys and wherefores more profound than our guesses"

Dr Bell: "King knew that hearts must be overthrown and not governments, that evil must be met, and resisted, on the battlefields of the mind, not with brutish, physical force, but with moral courage and integrity, with the fortitude of goodness, and the weapons of persistence in the face of a seemingly implacable enemy"

There's a profound and deep message in the above statements. First, and probably foremost, if a person does not believe them - both statements - he will not asorb them. Communication, then, for all practical purposes, ceases to exist. Consequently, we are left with merely preaching to the choir.

I'll leave my comment right there.

Well, I will say, when I hear others gives suggestions on the wherefores of "treatment" and what Mr. Williams should do in regards to said treatment, it's safe to say the overwhelming majority of people, knows little or nothing about treatment. I'll let that simmer.

Also, referencing Dr. Bells above statement (Dr. Kings journey to change the hearts and minds of others) how does one change the mind of another? If that question is not addressed and understood, the choir may well be the only listeners.

Here's another thought: Can a person change the mind of another? If so, what are all the elements that has to be part of that process? Hint: Read Black Diaspora's above words.

Anonymous said...

Yes this is very true! I really hope that he can get it together. That voice of his is amazing! I wish that someone would find me walking around the mall and give me a break like that with my writing. lol. You are so right to when you say that ONLY God can help us with our issues. I am learning that more and more as I get older. :o)